THE OMER INTERSECTION: Chesed + Chod; Humility in Love.
Shavua Tov - may this be a fantastic new week! Our intersecting virtues on this day involve the humbling aspects of love. Showing loving kindness towards another can build us up and make us feel very big and important. And yet it can also be a very humbling experience. Afterall, relationships happen between people, and they are not one-sided. For the sake of the other, we sometimes willingly endure that which we typically would never think of doing for ourselves. If our valued relationships are to be healthy, we sometimes have to remove our own ego and humble ourselves before another.
THE OMER CHALLENGE:
So, how do we apply this idea? In many ways, this has been a pre-requisite for the tasks in the last few days. In order to ensure endurance in a relationship, to be able to find compassion in our love, we have to find a bit of humility in our hearts - to suppress our own needs for being right, to let go of some of our frivolous expectations, to put the desires of others ahead of our own. This evening, as I settle in to write this blog, The Ten Commandments (digitally remastered in HD) is on in the background. And appropriately enough, Charlton Moses just said: "I myself, I am nothing, it is the power of God which uses me to work His will." If this is not humility, I don't know what is!
So, for today's challenge, I'm putting forth some options - doing one of these would be great, doing all will feel even better. But for today it is upon us to humble ourselves before our loved ones:
1) For one day, let go of the need to be right, and just be in relation.
2) Go forth and do something for a loved one that is fully about their needs, and not our own - be an aide to working someone else's will.
3) Reach out and repair a strained relationship - no matter who was "at fault" or "to blame," humble yourself before them and reach out. Make the first step in repairing the connection.
Yesterday involved a bit of self-reflection, thinking through the various aspects of the enduring nature of love. I thought through some of what makes me worth loving - it sounds a bit egotistical, which is why it is good to be followed by this next day of humility. But, I found it also to be a useful exercise in retaining self-confidence and self-worth. Let us not get carried away with our reflections, and let today remind us that we have to continue to earn that worthiness of being loved through our behaviors and choices that we make each day.
In addition to the reflective pieces of the day, I had the opportunity to spend time experiencing some of my most enduring relationships, as my wife, daughter, and I are all in my hometown visiting with my parents and siblings and their families. What a blessing to be able to spend time together reconnecting, creating new memories, and re-invigorating our commitments to one another.
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