Elul Workout #2: Pattern-Breaking

We have an opportunity at this time of year.  The structure we move into does not need to look the same as where we have been.  If there were routines that did not work for us or that led us into poor habits for our health, for our relationships, or for our sanity, we do not need to fall right back into them.  Rather, this is the time of year, the month of Elul, during which our Jewish tradition calls upon us to make intentional choices about the ways we approach the next year.  

As I mentioned last week, if we wait until Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur to do the work that it takes to change our routines, the High Holidays become a starting place 

instead of the kickoff celebration of our new, improved selves.  To maximize the impact of these High Holidays, we have to first engage in a spiritual workout and do the heavy lifting now, so that we can be in tip-top shape for the start of the year.

Elul Workout #2: Pattern-Breaking

Step 1: Take out your calendar, find a time for 10-15 minutes where you can “work-out” and copy the following steps into a time slot that works for you.  (If now is a good time,

then skip step 1)

Step 2: Take our your reflections from last week and review (If you need a reminder of what last week was about, click here)

Step 3: Reflect on the following questions (you are strongly encouraged to journal your thoughts and put them down on paper).  Be honest and avoid the temptation to become

defensive, even to yourself.

• What has been my biggest source of pride in this past year?  What has been the biggest source of my disappointment?

• What ways have I been less than my best self in this past year?

• List the patterns of behavior, the structured routines I have in my life (they may involve relationships, work, health, to name a few):

• What patterns of behavior have I just fallen into without thinking?

• Which of these routines help me?  Do they help those around me?

• Which of these routines hurt me?  Do they hurt those around me?

Step 4: Pick one routine to workshop for the next week – to analyze and see where there

is room to improve.  Write down some of your thoughts as to how you might create a

different approach.

May these Elul workouts bring us a step closer to a healthier, happier new year!

Elul Workout #1

This weekend begins the month of Elul, the month of our High Holidays. Elul is a time to reflect on the past year and begin the process of shuffling all of our last-second emotional and spiritual paperwork off of our desks so that we can enter this new year with a clean slate. Our rabbis teach that Yom Kippur is actually supposed to be a happy day! It is supposed to be the only day of the year where we have no weight on our shoulders of regret or guilt, because we have already let go of our shortcomings. But this day can only bring such excitement if we begin our reflective work now. 

In the coming weeks, I'm going to offer some Elul exercises, reflections or actions, that can help us get a little closer to the openness for the new year.  Before we jump right to the negatives that we hope to change, it is important to consider the gifts we hope to bring with us into the new year. I find that starting with our hopes and accomplishments helps us make space in our bandwidth for the more critical reflections that are needed to help us realize our dreams. So, we will start from this positive space:

ELUL ACTIVITY #1:

1) Take out your calendar and reserve 5 minutes to reflect this weekend. Copy the steps below into the calendar, so you have the info handy.

2) Ask yourself: 

- What were my three biggest accomplishments/happiest moments this year?

- Who do I need to thank for helping me experience these moments?

- What are my three biggest hopes for next year?

(I highly recommend actually journaling your answers, either in a notebook or on a document on your computer or phone - quick answers are a great start, if it's all the time you have)

3) Make a point to reach out and thank the people who helped you achieve your special moments. If time is an issue, calendar times to reach out to each person, so you know you'll do it.

I hope these steps start the process toward a happier and (spiritually) healthier new year.